We have to admit it, Disney princesses are illogical. They definitely are known to follow their hearts instead of their brains.
Disney should get some credit that they are trying to give their princesses a new spin. Moana actually had a realistic body type and did not fall in love with a man she just met. Elsa got a lot of credit when she told Ann that she could not marry a man she just met either.
If you’ve read any of our other articles about Disney princesses, you know that every single one has their unexplained quirks. The further back in Disney history we go, the more illogical actions we see. Take Snow White as an example. She did not even really know the prince and just accepted him after he kissed her in her coma. She accepted an apple from one of the most suspicious looking old woman in film. She found a house and just cleaned it after breaking in!
What about Cinderella who somehow had a perfectly fitting shoe slip off? Or what about Elsa saying she does not dance but then has the most memorable dance and musical number of the movie?
Princesses are more than Disney characters, they are a concept that influences the minds of little kids. So many little girls dream of getting rescued by a prince. So many boys see the ideal woman as beautiful, passive, and trusting.
So let’s give these princesses the doubt they deserve with these comics!
20 Not so cute anymore
The Little Mermaid got a little too real when the sea witch told Ariel that men prefer women without their voices anyway in the song “Poor Unfortunate Souls.” Admittedly, all the scenes between Ariel and Eric where she cannot speak and has to act out a lot are very endearing and a more entertaining part of the film.
Logically though, suddenly gaining a voice probably ruins that whole cute puppy-love aspect at the beginning.
Now Eric actually has to get to know her! God forbid! It’s easy to not think about the consequences of Ariel’s lack of voice with Eric. They get married very quickly so the comic is not far off that they did not have a conversation before their marriage. Ariel should have learned sign language.
Comic artist is Paul Westover.
19 Smart Mom
I think Jasmine’s mother was the voice of reason. Her passing away is probably why they got a tiger (we learned in Tales of Agrabah that Rajah was bought after her passing), why Jafar was never fired, and why Jasmine is not allowed outside.
Honestly, the Sultan is kind of a total fool isn’t he? He trusts Jafar more than his own daughter, even without hypnotism involved!
Very little is known about Jasmine’s mother, but we know she is referred as the “Sultana.” From the various books such as Tales of Agrabah, we learned that the Sultana had a horse named Sahara that was very attached and overprotective of her sort of like Rajah’s relationship with Jasmine. Like Ariel’s mother, Jasmine looks like a picture perfect resemblance.
Comic artist is Amy Kim.
18 A rich solution
Real question: what did the dwarves do with all the minerals and gems they mined? Did they sell to jewelers? We know very little about the kingdom. As a kid, I just sort of thought everything was woods except for the cottage and castle due to how little of the world we see.
How many guards does the Evil Queen even have? We don’t only see very little of the world, but very few characters in general. If she did have a lot of guards, she probably ruled them through magic and fear. Would their own greed trump their fear of her wrath?
A defining characteristic of Snow White is her naivety. Certainly she would not have thought of this idea herself. Maybe the dwarves would have?
17 Not subtle
You would imagine Tangled would be a little more logical due to being far more recent than movies like Aladdin or Snow White. It still follows a lot of the same ‘follow your heart and don’t think too hard about it’ formula though.
One such example is in the obvious picture of Rapunzel with her parents. Disney really should have hid the baby’s face by wrapping her up in a burrito. Tons of babies are all wrapped up in a burrito in art! It would have been cool if Disney even kept us in suspense about whether Rapunzel was actually royalty or not by keeping everything more subtle.
It made me all teary-eyed when she reunited with her parents and the scene could have even been more powerful if there was a little more risk involved by not knowing the truth until the end.
16 Solo snowman
Forget “Let it Go,” Anna’s song about building snowman is so catchy and annoying that it will stay in everyone’s head until the end of the time.
Why did Elsa build Olaf? She did not even seem to be aware that she created life. A lot more questions come about when you think about how she created life. She’s some kind of ice goddess, but now she can actually bring snow to life?
Olaf looks just like the snowman Elsa and Anna made as children. Elsa even says, “I’m Olaf, I like warm hugs,” as she pretends the snowman is alive as they are kids. Olaf repeats this later on in the movie on his own. With that in mind, she definitely created his personality as well.
Comic was made by tomperwomper.
15 Hair is too long
Disney probably threw logic out the window for the convenience of Rapunzel getting through town without her hair tangling with people’s homes and market stands.
In the first panel, her braid looks a little thinner. Are the kids some kind of hair braiding geniuses and somehow layered the braids to make it as thick as it is in the second panel? Then again, the flowers that were added to her hair could have bulked the braids a ton.
There is no way the kids accomplished that braid.
Look at their braids and then look at Rapunzel’s braid. Did those kids come from a famous town salon? Rapunzel’s hair is amazing in this part of the film. It’s like she’s ready to ascend into the heavens and become a harvest goddess.
14 Real bodies
Princesses are ridiculously skinny around the waist. Look at Ariel. That is impossible for containing a healthy rib cage and organs. You may not notice the difference at first, but take a look closer and see that someone edited each princess to have a more realistic body next to the Disney original.
It’s easy to not think about it when it’s all you know, but the creator of this comic really has shown the warped appearance of the original princess bodies. Look at Jasmine! It’s like she’s starving.
Maybe a tight corset is a good excuse for an hourglass look, but even corsets don’t make you as skinny as some of these princesses (and they are not even wearing corsets)! So besides all these illogical decisions from these princesses, their own bodies are crazy illogical.
13 Different accent
Though princesses are most infamous for their illogical trends, Disney also has made illogical choices in their other films such as Tarzan. First of all, Disney is bad at accents. For example, despite Beauty and the Beast taking place in France, no one but Lumière and Plumette possess French accents. That’s rather easy to notice.
Tarzan’s accent is a little more difficult to notice since he did not speak English in the first place.
I personally did not consider that he should have an English accent due to learning English from someone with an English accent. Though now that this one points it out, it does make sense that he should have an accent!
Now I just really want to know what Tarzan would sound like with an English accent. It’s hard to imagine.
12 If the shoe fits….
The size of Cinderella’s shoes is not the only illogical bit in her story. The fact that they are made of glass really stand out.
In fact, a study proved how illogical glass slippers would be. A few students at the University of Leicester in England tested out if glass slippers could withstand all of Cinderella’s standing, walking, running, and dancing.
Their findings were that Cinderella could stand in the slippers but to run in them would require a heel of less than 1.15 centimeters in height. Unfortunately her slippers have heels that reach far higher than just an inch. With heels that tall, the shoes should have shattered the moment she stepped up on the carriage to the ball.
Forget the size, glass slippers sound awful! If they break, it will really hurt your feet.
11 Breaking and cleaning
Snow White seems like the greatest fool in the world for the stunts she pulled in her movie. Breaking into a house would leave any average person terrified and on edge. The house could belong to any kind of person. The moment they see you in their home, they probably would conside you a threat.
The dwarves were suckers for Snow White’s sweet face I guess. That is one of the highlights of being the fairest of them all.
If someone broke into my house and cleaned it, I would live in fear. Who cares about a clean home? Someone broke into the house! It’s hard to decide whether the dwarves were brave and upstanding or foolish for letting Snow White stay since they did not know her background.
10 Drama Queens
Who has done this? How common is it? Having been a teenager, chances could be likely. Life is cruel and it’s fine to just throw yourself on an inanimate object and cry sometimes.
What is your inmate object of choice to cry on? Rocks are great, but beds are soft. Cinderella had a bunch of jerks in her house, so she had to settle for a bench outside. Poor girl. Then Mulan went utterly hardcore with a dragon statue in the rain.
In terms of Ariel’s situation, what is it like to cry under water? Does this mean she can swim in her own tears? Does the water pressure make it so the tears cannot even come out and mermaids just get achy eyes with a sore throat when they are upset?
9 Flimsy Sultan
To be a little easy on why the Sultan changed his mind, Aladdin did kind of save their lives from Jafar.
Despite that, the Sultan is really a foolish character and kind of a bad father. He even can be called a terrible Sultan! Just look at Agrabah. The luxurious palace towers over nothing but slums. The people seem to live in poverty. We see that through Aladdin’s stealing and we even see children starving in the streets. Meanwhile we see the Sultan playing with toys!
Is the Sultan good at anything? He is a miserable judge of character since he trusts Jafar. He also doesn’t really investigate if Aladdin is worthy of marrying Jasmine. He just sort of accepts him without doing any work.
8 She “Let it Go”
This actually made sense to me. Elsa has a major change of character once her powers are revealed to the public. Was it really a major change though?
She’s definitely shy, inhibited, and very paranoid about how others see her. She was raised to be that way and was very sheltered to the point where the public is probably seen as a scary place to be. Elsa believes other people won’t accept her for who she is, and her parents taught her that from a very young age.
Of course Elsa would not like dancing, as even an average person gets stage fright when it comes to dancing.
When people are alone though? Of course they don’t mind dancing! It’s the same deal with singing. Is that the whole point of the song? She is letting go of her inhibitions since she’s finally alone where no one can judge her.
Comic was made by Art-Zealot.
7 Not so dainty
Crocs are known to be hideous despite their popularity. The popularity has lessened with time probably because of half of the population hates them. It’s actually kind of funny how controversial the shoe got. They are now the embodiment of shoe satire.
Fashion consultant Tim Gunn told Time magazine, “… the Croc – it looks like a plastic hoof. How can you take that seriously?” That’s hilarious. In May 2010, Time magazine even listed Crocs as one of the world’s “50 Worst Inventions” Wow! There is even a website called “I hate Crocs” which is dedicated to the elimination of Crocs. It has videos of people cutting and burning Crocs! Talk about a passion for fashion.
Honestly though, a Croc slipping off makes way more sense than a perfect fitting glass slipper.
6 Two day love
Frozen got a lot of applause for the recognition of the dangers of trusting a man you just met. However, we still got a man that we trusted after just meeting him and he turned out to be good and accepted anyway!
Finding out what happens to Ann and Kristoff’s relationship is going to be a big deal in Frozen II. Did Ann learn her lesson about jumping into marriage? Or is Disney going to mess up their big lesson by showing it would be okay as long as it’s a good guy?
Kristoff would make an adorable Disney prince though. His body type is not a boring Ken-doll sort of shape. His sarcasm and background as an ice cutter is also really cool (get it? cool?).
Comic artist is unknown.
5 A different fairy godmother
Helena Bonham Carter as Cinderella’s Fairy Godmother in the live action reboot went for a very different feel than the original Disney film. Disney sort of traded a sweet old grandmotherly woman for a younger, kooky woman in a beautiful dress. The change was fairly strange and just seemed like an excuse to show off more of what the movie has in terms of ballroom gowns and make-up.
According to Nostalgia Critic, the fairy godmother of the live action remake was a huge step down from the original.
The remake grandmother goes as far as to test Cinderella’s kindness before helping her. That’s more of an enchantress thing to do, isn’t it? In the original, she appears to comfort Cinderella while the woman is at her worst.
Comic was made by daekazu.
4 A similar look
According to the artist of the comic, the remake of Cinderella’s gown looked just like a recolor of Belle’s golden gown from Beauty and the Beast. Also wasn’t Cinderella’s dress more white than blue in the animated version? Why do all the redraws, reboots, and merchandise make her dress blue? The white and original version was beautiful!
Some Cinderella fans even argued that Disney made the fairy godmother’s dress prettier than Cinderella’s. That’s a pretty big issue since the original fairy godmother wore a cloak instead of a dress. Maybe that was so she would not upstage the protagonist?
The reboot dress also was far more modernized. The original kept more to its time period through the use of gloves and the up-do hairstyle. Since Beauty and the Beast’s reboot, some even think Cinderella’s looks more like Belle’s in the original than Emma Watson’s dress in the reboot!
3 Planning ahead
Cinderella sort of just resigns herself to enjoying herself for one night and then going back to slaving away for her step-mother and sisters. If she didn’t, then why did she not tell the prince the truth? Would the spell have broken if she tried to see him later at all? That would be a rather cruel spell. Did she think he would not love the real her, who is a commoner?
That would make sense, but it’s never touched upon in the movie. In the original movie, she is groomed since childhood to accept her fate. A greater emphasis could have been put into that part of Cinderella’s life. It’s not even explored in the reboot since she isn’t groomed from a young age and instead gets her step-nightmares as an older girl.
2 Dangerous pet
We need to talk about Jasmine’s tiger, Rajah. The tiger’s background was revealed in the book Tales of Agrabah. Little princess Jasmine discovered Rajah as a cub at a circus. Now it’s not so unbelievable for royalty to just buy an exotic animal without thinking of the consequences.
It’s a real thing that has happened in history. Ever visit the Tower of London? There are exotic animal statues to commemorate a collection of exotic animals that were allowed to roam free. Dangerous? Oh yes. There were a lot of injuries and worse situations due to the fascination and lack of animal knowledge.
Let’s get this straight, tigers cannot be domesticated. Domestication comes from tons of breeding for hundreds of years where the animal’s genes change to the point that they thrive with humans. In real life, Rajah would be a tragedy waiting to happen.
1 Beware the wheel
Even if this comic were canon, would anything really have changed? Wasn’t Aurora possessed to touch the spinning wheel? She certainly looked possessed. If that’s the case, then no kind of warning would matter. Mind control is like the most powerful and frightening magic there is because there would be no way to prepare for it.
Her parents were not involved in her life anyway. It should be the fairies that are giving her the warning. Though, admittedly, the fairies are written to not be that smart. They cannot even make birthday cake correctly or conclude on a dress color.
What if Maleficent’s prophecy came true in an ironic way? Like if Aurora’s fairies warned her and that just made her want to rebel and do it anyway? She’s at that rebellious age anyway.
