The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim started as merely a game and became an international sensation. To date, Skyrim has sold over 30 million copies worldwide. As well, according to Bethesda, the average Skyrim player spends around 150 hours in-game. While this is the average number, there have been players posting online who have claimed to have spent over 1000 hours in the well-adored fantasy world that Bethesda has created. It is safe to say that Skyrim was a huge success for the critically-acclaimed developer and that success has spread like wildfire, spawning memes, fan-made comics, overplayed jokes, and everything in between. Yet, perhaps the most dedicated form of fan art is actually the unofficial mods created for the game itself.
While the main quest of Skyrim can be completed in a relatively short amount of time, the countless mods that have been created for the game have extended the lifetime of the series ten-fold or more. After all, it’s hard to get sick of a game that you can change at will. Sometimes these changes are small aesthetic aspects, and sometimes they are over-the-top cross-overs from famous anime series, superheroes and even other games. Even though it has been over 6 years since its initial release date, Skyrim is still alive and kicking. And until The Elder Scrolls VI comes out the worldwide love for Skyrim won’t be going anywhere anytime soon.
30 From Zero To Hero Real Quick
The world of Skyrim, albeit a fantasy world, is also a world with a variety of citizens much like ours. There are lords and ladies, as well as the upper, middle, and lower classes. Throughout the player’s time as the Dragonborn, a variety of quests will be offered to them. These quests range from very difficult tasks such as defeating a traitor within the thieves guild or very simple tasks like ridding a shop or a house of an infestation of mud crabs in the basement. Obviously, if someone is willing to pay good money to hire an adventurer to clear out a pest infestation in their cellar they are either rolling in the dough or simply too weak to handle the situation by themselves.
However, regardless of how weak the NPC may seem and how much they appear to value their safety, all that falls apart when a dragon comes to town. As many veteran players will have noticed, when a town or settlement is attacked by a dragon it seems like everyone and their grandmother lose all sense of fear and join forces to take down the dragon together. That NPC from a few moments ago who was begging you to squash a few bugs in their house suddenly takes on the persona of Bruce Lee and thinks their fists will pierce dragon scales.
Comic by The Escapist.
29 Always Critical
While players of Pokémon have all too often seen the message it’s not very effective, Skyrim players experience the opposite in the sense that any hit can be super effective. It seems as though any hit on an opponent in Skyrim can be fatal depending on the player’s level vs. their opponent’s level. Since enemies in Skyrim have a maximum health gauge, when an enemy’s health is low enough, a strike on any body part will be a fatal one. Therefore, silly as it may seem, a player can defeat an enemy by merely striking an enemy’s toe, hand, or other non-fatal areas. While logically, this may seem ridiculous and damaging to the realism of the game there really is no way around this and many, if not all other games on the market use a similar damage system.
While a large number of games on the market, be it the RPG or even the first-person shooter genre, do set higher damage rates for fatal areas (i.e. the head and the chest), the final blows to an enemy can take place anywhere on their body. However, as the comic above points out, compared to other games like Tomb Raider or the Uncharted series, where enemies take multiple gunshots to take down, Skyrim players have nothing to complain about.
Comic by ChaturaBlossoms.
28 It’s Just Weight
You’ve heard of hoarders, the people who have a psychological disorder which hinders them from getting rid of the trash, garbage, and old junk overcrowding their homes and their lives. Well, hoarders in Skyrim are on a whole other level. The main difference being that hoarders in The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim don’t merely leave random dragon bones in a chest in their home, but also carry around countless rare and valuable items around with them everywhere they go. Whether these items be rare weapons and armor, precious stones or the bones of deceased dragons, if the item has value, it’s likely the Dragonborn is bound to pick it up despite how close they are to becoming over-encumbered.
It’s a sickness for which unfortunately there is no potion nor no magical cure.
While no player would like to admit it, hoarding is something inevitable, which every player has shamefully indulged in within the lands of Skyrim. Although it is true that a player’s maximum carrying capacity increases in tandem with their strength level, the carrying capacity never seems to rise high enough. This is due to the brilliance of Bethesda and the countless hours of work they’ve put into the detail and lore of each item in the game, making players want to grab every rare item they come across.
Comic by Ayej.
27 Companions In The Way
One of my favorite things about The Elder Scrolls series is the companion system. While RPGs are generally played alone and can be enjoyed alone, it makes it a tad less lonely when there’s an AI companion helping you fight your battles along the way.
The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim has a variety of different companions to choose from.
Each of these companions have different weapon preferences, appearances, and fighting styles. Some companions are available for hire and require a monetary fee, while others can be found in certain guilds or factions. As well, depending on your choices in the game and dialogue choices, players can woo certain companion characters in the game and marry them. Some players use companions merely as an extra carrying case for the random weapons they want to hoard, others rely on companions in battle. However, some companions are simply so brainless that they get in the way more than they help. I am sure that everyone who has played Skyrim with a companion for a marginal amount of time will have noticed that companions tend to block your path, especially when entering and leaving houses, shops or other buildings. I can’t be the only one who has tried to FUS-RO-DAH my companion out of the way to no avail, but I’m sure true companions are bound to bang heads more than once or twice.
26 Bigger Fish To Fry
While friendly-fire may have been an enjoyable pastime for Counterstrike, Halo, or Call of Duty trolls back in the day, the guards of Skyrim don’t take friendly-fire lightly, no matter how minor the infraction. Attacking any NPC in a city, town, or other settlement will send guards and other NPCs at your throat. Despite being the Dragonborn and having destroyed countless monsters, beasts, and dragons with your bare hands, everyone wants to be a hero when the Dragonborn is the accused. As this amateur, yet impeccably done hand-drawn comic points out, guards are sticklers when it comes to friendly-fire even in the midst of a chaotic dragon attack.
The spray or damage area of numerous dragon shouts are quite wide. As a result, NPCs can sometimes be caught in the crossfire. While aiming upwards and trying to blow an enemy dragon back with a dragon shout, it’s common to sometimes hit a guard or two. Common sense on the guard’s part would, of course, be to let it slide, or at the very least, wait until the dragon is taken care of before reprimanding you. However, that is not the case. The guards will come straight at you despite having bigger fish or dragons to fry.
Comic by Ninja Gandalf.
25 Distracted By The Scenery
It goes without saying that role-playing games are meant to exhibit a sense of adventure and perhaps no other genre does this better than open-world sandbox games. At the top of this genre, Skyrim is king. One of the best things about Bethesda games is their beautiful level design and incredibly polished graphics. Because of their well-done graphics, the scenery and terrain of the world feel so real.
Never before has roaming around aimlessly in a game been so fun and addictive.
If you don’t care too much for the main story of the game, you have nothing to worry about. Simply walk around for a few minutes and you’re bound to encounter an enemy or an NPC in need of help. See a tall mountain in the distance and wonder how the view looks from its summit? Start walking, because in Skyrim, if you can see it, you can reach it one way or another. Skyrim is one of the only games in my life where I became so engrossed in the world of the game that I caught myself simply moving the camera around to enjoy the scenery. As this comic so accurately points out, while we came for the action, many of us stay for the beautiful art of the game.
24 Don’t Blink
While the previous section discussed how traveling in open-world games can be enjoyable, most of the time it can be tedious, regardless of how beautiful the surroundings are. In the large, vast world of The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim, traveling alone can take up insurmountable amounts of time. Bethesda, like many other developers before, them gave players a way to get around this obstacle by implementing the fast-travel mechanic. What is fast-travel? Basically, any place the player has been to before can be “teleported” to by simply opening the map, and clicking on the desired destination.
While it feels like teleportation to the player, the Dragonborn is actually doing all of the traveling on foot. Meanwhile, the world continues to spin and the sun continues to rise and fall as time in the world of Skyrim passes as normal. However, the player gets to skip all the tedious and event-less walking in between locations. While the Dragonborn has many powers: unparalleled physical strength, heightened combat ability, and you know, the ability to stop time with their voice, one power they unfortunately don’t have is true teleportation. However, if that were the case, it is easy to see how annoying it would be if some adventurer wreaking havoc kept appearing out of nowhere in the middle of the town.
Comic by Dorkly.
23 Stealth Level Zero
As mentioned in a previous section, sometimes companions in The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim can get in the way. However, sometimes they can do much worse than simply get in your way. Sometimes they can lead to your utter demise. As all Elder Scrolls gamers will know, Skyrim is a game of adventure.
These adventures can take place in lush, ice-capped mountains, on the battlements of a castle, or in the ruins of an ancient and lost civilization.
In such ruins, there are bound to be traps of every sort ranging from trapped doors, spiked floors, trip-wire triggered flamethrowers, and everything in between. Unfortunately, traps can be triggered by your companion’s movements which, generally, are unpredictable and can’t be strictly controlled by the player in any way. This is especially infuriating when you notice a floor covered with traps and take extra special care not to step on them, and your companion comes waltzing in like a blind man and manages to somehow step on every single one. Not only will they be hit with whatever trap they just set up, but more likely than not you too will be caught in the crossfire. Therefore, while everyone loves companions in Skyrim, sometimes they do more harm than good when their stealth level is zero.
22 Ghost Arrows
When it comes to enemy AI, creating the right amount of awareness in the NPCs is key to making a game challenging yet not impossible. With that said, it is difficult for any developer to find a happy medium between realism and playability. Enemies have to be intelligent enough to give players a sense of accomplishment when defeating them, yet not smart enough to render stealth mode unusable. Yes, Bethesda knows that crouching doesn’t make you invisible, but internet trolls, meme creators, and artists have ruthlessly bashed the brainless AI of some NPCs in The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim. But hey, at least we can all get a laugh out of it.
One particular exploit of the less-than-genius NPCs in the game is shooting arrows or other projectiles in their direction and sometimes even striking them. If a player is out of vision and crouched in stealth mode, some NPCs will look confusedly in all directions and after a few moments simply give up and go back to standing aimlessly. While this can be excused for things like twigs snapping or even rocks being thrown, it is hard to imagine a guard forgetting about the fact that an arrow just flew past his head. But who knows? Maybe a ghost shot it.
Comic by Whomp Comic.
21 Flying Mammoths
Being an open-world game, Skyrim and all Elder Scrolls games, in general, are famous for their incredibly large and detailed maps. With improved technology on both console and PC gaming, rendering times are getting quicker if not non-existent. That means players can roam from one area of the map all the way to the other end without being forced to watch a loading screen for 5 minutes. Coming from an era where it took 15 minutes just to boot up your computer, I can tell you this is an amazing feat. However, the advances in convenience when it comes to gaming is not without its faults.
Some people are of the opinion that games are being released too quickly.
Because of the internet, developers can merely send “updates” to patch issues or bugs in the game and thus are not so worried about shipping a flawed product. While major issues in Skyrim are slim-to-none there are a few minor glitches that happen from time to time which don’t hinder the overall gameplay. One of the more humorous commonly reported glitches is one which spawns mammoths floating dozens of feet above-land. While Skyrim is a fantasy land, something tells us these mammoths weren’t meant to be there.
20 Skyrim Logic Vs. Pokémon Logic
In the earlier days of role-playing games, there wasn’t much of a system in place regarding morality and social norms as they relate to the real world. For example, in role-playing games like Final Fantasy or even Pokémon, players were encouraged to roam about the world map entering and exiting buildings, and private residences as they wished. Not only were players free to roam around, but any items, chests, or other storage devices in or around those houses and buildings were free for the taking. While this has become so normal in video games, the same cannot be said for the real world. Even entering someone’s garden without permission is technically trespassing. In Pokémon, when the player barged into someone’s house, not only were they greeted with open arms and a friendly chat, sometimes residents would even give the player a gift item.
This is not true for The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim.
In Skyrim, breaking into a locked house would mean a hefty fine and guards chasing you down if you fail to pay it. The same goes for touching what doesn’t belong to you. While some houses are filled with loot, taking anything that is displayed in red font is considered stealing, and rightfully so.
19 Climb First, Talk Later
In Minecraft, you mine. In Pokémon, you catch Pokémon, and in The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim, you scale mountains. No one really knows what it is about Skyrim, maybe it’s the breathtaking level design, the intricate graphics, or it could be just the sheer sense of adventure. But you’d be hard-pressed to find someone who hasn’t wasted time trying to best mother nature and climb to the summit of one of Skyrim’s many mountains. Without fail, exploring mountainous landscapes is a guilty pleasure of almost every gamer ever to set foot on the land of Skyrim.
Even though most of us would never dream of hiking such distances or simply taking the stairs instead of the elevator, in Skyrim we can escape from our usual lazy selves. Part of the beauty of Skyrim is the ability to do things we have never dreamed of attempting. So disregard the urgency of the main quest. Forget about whatever guild you’re in and side quests you want to complete. Instead, take a breath and scale one of the many mountains in the game. You may feel like you have wasted an hour of your life or you may just be glad you did. As this comic hilariously points out, even other games use Skyrim logic sometimes!
18 Beauty Before Everything
One of Bethesda developer’s many strengths is their brilliant and intricate weapon design. Some weapons have an incredible history and amount of lore behind them. Other weapons are prizes you win from defeating enemies and some weapons simply just look too cool not to pick up. Whatever the case may be, The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim is a game where inventory space is a serious issue. Players will find themselves wanting to pickup every uncommon weapon they set their eyes on. However, regardless of how brilliant the design of an item, looks don’t necessarily reflect strength or quality. Sometimes the most powerful looking weapon won’t be that strong. Other times, simple looking weapons may be the strongest in the game. While it’s not our place to tell you how to play, don’t be fooled by looks or you may find yourself in the belly of an angry dragon. Some players get too hung up on the aesthetics and choose the weapon that looks the most ancient or most evil.
For example, one of the most useful and most powerful weapons in the game is called Windshear.
The sword looks like a simple and weak pirate sword with no distinguishing factors other than the fact that it looks like a pirate sword in a world without pirates. In reality, the sword has the amazing effect of staggering opponents with every hit, including dragons.
17 Titles Schmitles
In Skyrim, there are a large array of factions, guilds, and orders the player can join. Almost all of these can be joined without conflicting with the others. Because of that, some players may find themselves the holder of many high positions and titles in numerous guilds. If a player pours hundreds of hours into the game, as many players do, then it’s even possible to become the leader of many of these guilds and factions. However, don’t let your pride fool you.
We had the Magna Carta in the real world and Skyrim guards follow the same sense of justice. Regardless of how strong you are and what titles you hold, if you commit a crime, no matter how small the crime, the guards in the game will come after you with everything they’ve got. To them, it doesn’t matter if your saved the land from a plague of dragons, or are dubbed the most powerful mage or leader of The Companions. Regardless of your crime, be it minor thievery to full-blown injury, you will be punished for it. So rise up the ranks of whatever guild you wish but don’t let it get to your head. A crime’s a crime no matter who you are.
Comic by Virtual Shackles.
16 Which Way Is Up?
If you’ve played Skyrim for a couple hours you may notice something is off with the physics of the game. However, when you’re playing a game full of dragons, werewolves, mages, and monsters, lack of realism isn’t something you should be complaining about. Skyrim is a world of fantasy and exploration. During such exploration, some travelers may find themselves riding a horse instead of sprinting cross-country for hours. Horses can be found, stolen from other characters or purchased from various horse ranches throughout the game. Riding a horse is a much faster method of traveling and doesn’t deplete your character’s stamina like sprinting does. Players can even fast travel while riding horses.
Although, while horses are so convenient in Skyrim, some players with too much time on their hands whine about the impossibility of horses climbing up mountains. As mentioned previously, mountains are some of the most popular areas in Skyrim and many a player have taken to riding a horse up a mountain and luckily, Skyrim lets you do just that. To top it all off the horses can climb up impossibly steep slopes. While these comics are funny as they are accurate, let’s not draw Bethesda’s attention to this bug or they might patch it.
15 Arrows In Knees
Being a lover of The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim, I have spent countless hours in the game, watched hours of gameplay video, fan-made videos, spoof trailers, and so on. In addition, I have read tons of comics, and laughed at forums filled with memes. At the end of it all I think it is safe to say that everyone should move on and stop highlighting the overplayed, overmilked, and overdone jokes regarding the line: I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I took an arrow in the knee. It has become literally impossible to Google Skyrim without one of these references popping up. The madness of this reference has even sparked debates and conspiracy theories claiming that the phrase is said by all the guards in Skyrim because it is actually a Nordic slang to mean becoming betrothed.
This would make sense since becoming a town guard is a much more secure job for a husband and/or family man when compared to the unpredictability of being an adventurer. However, this has not been confirmed by Bethesda in any way and has even been indirectly debunked (some members on the development team claimed it was just a line they liked). Thus it’s time to put the line to rest, and put something else on the meme generator’s plate.
14 Got 99 Problems But Gold Ain’t One
Being over-encumbered is an incredibly common and frequent problem in every Bethesda game, and The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim is no exception. Being over-encumbered refers to a state in which the player’s character is carrying weight above their maximum carrying capacity. In this state, players cannot fast-travel nor sprint, but instead walk at a snail’s pace. In this sense, the incredible weapon designs and overall item designs of Bethesda are both a blessing and a curse to players. Everything in the game looks so beautiful or exquisite that players can’t help but grab them without even looking at their inventory capacity. All the weapons, armor, and consumables in the game have weight, even down to the small pieces of cheese, and random spoons the player may pick up in the course of their travels.
There are a few exceptions to this rule and the most important one is gold or Septims, the currency of the land of Skyrim. While player’s are limited to the items they may carry, players can carry an unlimited amount of Septims as they hold no weight in the game. While this literally makes no sense, having weightless currency is common in almost every RPG.
13 Pack Mules
As mentioned in the previous article, Skyrim is a game where players constantly have problems with over packing their inventory. With that said, one way around this issue is to acquire a companion. I know what you’re thinking and no in this case, companion is not some risqué innuendo. Companions in Skyrim are NPCs that can accompany you on your quests and travels. Companions will follow you, fight your battles with you and protect you when you are being attacked. Yet, surprisingly, their best use has nothing to do with battle or their various special abilities.
The best and most common use of companions is to use them as extra storage space.
Perhaps Bethesda foresaw this, as numerous companions throughout the game will gripe and moan while you “trade” items with them and fill their inventory to the brim. They’ll tell you that they aren’t your pack mule, but in reality, that’s what most companions end up being in Skyrim. When Dragon Bones are so valuable but weigh 15 encumbrance per piece, companions make hoarding in Skyrim so much easier and in general improve the overall experience. But be careful, if you anger a companion enough (for example: propose to them but cancel the wedding at the last minute) they may leave you and take all your items with them.
Comic by Linda Kindt.
12 Skyrim Goggles
You know that feeling you got during your last days of high school, knowing you were soon to graduate and never set foot in your school’s halls again? Remember when you thought you might actually miss the place and the boring teachers whose classes you slept through. That experience is called graduation goggles. Players of Skyrim experience a similar phenomenon, one which changes their outlook on the real world around them. Skyrim Goggles refers to players who have spent so much time in the fantasy world of the game that they view their real world differently. Pokémon lovers see animals differently, Fortnite addicts see wooden pallets as gold, and Skyrim adventurers see mountains and caves as treasure troves to explore.
If you are one of these people, not to worry you’re not alone and the condition is not so serious. However, if you start to see compass overlays and HP and MG gauges hovering over thin air, maybe it might be time to see a medical professional. Moreover and more importantly, if you see a creepy and dark cave in the middle of nowhere with no one in sight, it may be best to steer clear of it. The same goes for snow-capped mountains.
11 Off The Beaten Path Every Time
Skyrim is a game the can be played in many different ways. Some people play as an archer, others as a dark mage, a thief, and sometimes even a villain. However, one role that every gamer ever to set foot on the lands of Skyrim will play is the role of the wanderer. Maybe it’s the beautiful landscapes, maybe it is the freedom of the open world or maybe it is simply the feeling of escape and wonder that the world of Skyrim provides. Whatever the case may be, players simply can’t resist the urge to stray from the path of their main or side quest.
When a quest marker may not be so far away, and the average completion time for a quest may by less than an hour, more often than not, some quests won’t be completed for days. However, for myself and for many, therein lies the very beauty and diversity of Skyrim. It’s a game where players forge their own story and have no urgency or need to follow the path that developers have set before them. That is the very essence of the open-world genre which Skyrim captures so perfectly like no other game before it.
